When Comparison Kills Confidence

Sharon JaynesIdentity in Christ, Listening to God, Take Hold of the Faith You Long For 87 Comments

If there’s one thing I know it’s this: The measuring stick will get you stuck! Comparison is the devil’s tool that has stopped many of us gals from stepping into our God-given destinies…and it’s time to stop!

I camped out with Moses by the burning bush for more than a year when I was writing the book, Take Hold of the Faith You Long For. When I met him in Exodus chapter 3, he was an insecure, stuttering recluse. He argued with God and told him He had the wrong man for the job. He stuttered, sputtered, and had difficulty speaking. I knew exactly how he felt…I had been just like him.

But, Moses hadn’t always been so insecure. He hadn’t always had a speech impediment. Look at what Stephen said to the Sanhedrin just before he was martyred: “Moses was educated in all the wisdom of the Egyptians and was powerful in speech and action” (Acts 7:22). He was powerful in speech and action? That’s what The Book says.

So what happened? Moses forgot his pre-ordained preparation and his God-given ability. He made some bad decisions, got caught, ran away, and stayed away. During his forty years hiding in the wilderness taking care of sheep, his self-confidence hit rock bottom.

Oh, I wish I was sitting right there with you and we could just chat and throw around ideas. For now, I’ll just ask you this question and maybe one day we’ll sit and talk long.

How do you think that Moses came up with the idea that he was not a good speaker? Here’s what I think. I think that Moses came up with the idea by comparing himself to other people he thought were good speakers.

It’s the same way with you and me. Comparison opens the door for sabotaging lies to steal our confidence, stymie our courage, and stand in the way of our contentment. Comparison puts up roadblocks along the path to fulfilling our God-given calling by setting an undefined standard of approval and acceptance.

We fear the REJECT stamp will come crashing down with wet ink that mars all of life. We fear that we are perhaps fatally flawed as confidence seeps through the holes of insecurity punctured and punctuated by comparison.

We compare our abilities to someone else’s and come to this conclusion: I could never do it like she does it. And you know what? You were never meant to! God doesn’t need two people just alike. He has uniquely and precisely created you with specific gifts and talents to do exactly what He has called you to do. So get good at being you!

David wrote: “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well (Psalms 139:13-14 NIV emphasis added).

He knew what full well? In these particular verses, David wasn’t praising God for the way He flung the stars in the night sky, set the spinning earth on its axis, or stocked the oceans with sea creatures of every kind. David was marveling at the magnificent masterpiece called David. Me. You. He knew that full well.

You are God’s workmanship. His masterpiece—His grand finale of all creation. Do you know that full well? You are amazing!

God knows our inadequacies and our insecurities. He knows what caused them and who caused them. He saw you before you even had them. Yet He chose you before you were born for a purpose—to fulfill a plan in a predetermined point in time (Acts 17:26).

So, let’s let go of comparison and take hold of our God-given uniqueness!

Lord, thank You for making me with unique gifts and talents. Thank You that there is no one else just like me, but I was created to Your specifications. Help me to stop comparing myself to others, but to be the best me I can be. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

If you believe you are uniquely fashioned for God’s purpose and plan, leave a comment that says, “I’m fabulously fashioned by God!”

Take Hold of the Faith you Long For

Today’s devotion comes from Take Hold of the Faith You Long For: Let Go, Move Forward, Live Bold. Just as a trapeze artist who grabs hold of a second bar but refuses to let go of the first, we can get stuck in our faith when we refuse to let go of all that holds us back. It’s time to let go of all that holds us hostage to a “less than” life…and that includes comparing ourselves to others. Let’s take hold of all that Jesus has already taken hold of for us and placed in us!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

©2023 by Sharon Jaynes.  All rights reserved.

 

 

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Comments 87

  4. “I am fabulously fashioned by God”. Typing this is somewhat a challenge . I believe fully that God does not make mistakes and He does have a plan and purpose for me. I still struggle with “the what “ He wants me to do… seeking this, asking Him to know my purpose.

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    1. Dear Lisa, I love what you said. You have described me perfectly. Right now I am so defeated by comparing myself with my “type AA” brother until I am deeply depressed. I know in my head that I am wonderfully fashioned by GOD, but that truth is slow reaching my heart.

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    2. “I’m fabulously fashioned by God!” Lisa thank you for sharing this because I thought I was the only one feeling like this. I am forever asking our Heavenly Father to show me his will and then questioning if this is truly what he wants of me.

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  6. I used to tell my children about God’s creativity. It would be a boring world if we were all the same. I’m spreading that message to my grandchildren now when they start comparing/wishing they could be like ______.

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  10. Sharon you spoke directly to my heart. I have been battling voices in my head telling me how inadequate I am because of all the hardships I’ve gone through ever since I can remember. I am the only surviving member of my nuclear family, I am married to a wonderful man and blessed with two beautiful kids. I lost two though…but I have been struggling with lots of insecurities…but I’m taking my rightful position now in Jesus name.
    I’m fabulously fashioned by God.
    I love your blog. God bless you.
    Rahab from Kenya.

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  12. I struggle with self confidence and always have. Not because of lack of love from my living family but because I’ve begun the terrible habit of bad self talk.. I’m my worst enemy as I constantly put myself down and play the comparison game. I’ll be 60 in July and still struggle with this. Todays devotional is one I needed. Thank you so much 😊

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  13. I was carefully designed, delicately fashioned and made unique for God’s purposes for me. His plans will not be thwarted!! I will remember my gifts and talents. I will renew my mind with the truth of God’s word. His grace is sufficient for me.

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  16. I’m fabulously fashioned by God. Thank you for this. I have been struggling in some areas of my life for a long time and this week found myself comparing, so this was great timing for me to read this.

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  18. Thank you for this devotional!!!!! I needed to hear and read your words at this time in my life. I can get caught up in the comparison game so often, but you have given me a reminder that God made me to be me and no one else. I want ME to be the woman that adores and lives for HIM, so HE can use me for what He has created me for and HE WILL BE GLORIFIED!!!!!! Thank you again for this message. Debbie

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  19. I am fabulously fashioned by God! I am going to get good at being me. Jeremiah 29:11 says God had a plan for my life and it is for good. I didn’t feel this way before I read your blog this morning Sharon but am now ready to walk in who God created me to be holding firmly to my saviors hand and boldly step out where He leads me. Thank you Sharon. I needed this.

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  22. I am a daughter of the King, fashioned to be all that He wants me to be. NOT like someone else’s image but created for whatever He has for me. We are all originals, not copies of each other.

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  23. Thank you Sharon, your messages always pop up for me at the times I need it. The youngest of 4 girls, I never feel as smart and accomplished as my sisters, it’s nothing they have done to me, they are my dear friends and confidants. I’m simply different. This helps a lot to hear your thoughts.

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  24. “I’m fabulously fashioned by God!”

    I enjoy your writing .. it as though you are talking to the reader!
    Your message is excellent.. thank you!

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  28. I am fabulously fashioned by God! Thanks Sharon for this wonderful reminder. My insecurities lead me into the comparison game and I despise that feeling. God has blessed me so good and I know I am who He created me to be. Certain people bring out these insecurities in me, and I’m learning how to recognize and fight those feelings. There is only one me, and I want to be all that God created me to be.

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  30. Thank you for sharing God’s word with us today. We are starting a Ladies Bible Study and will be using you book “Take Hold of the Faith You Long For ” as a guide. Looking forward to sharing your incites with these ladies. Thank you for answering God’s call to write.
    Becky

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  31. I am fabulously fashioned, treasured, known, seen, and loved by God who is my creator, sustainer, and lifter of my head!!! Praise the Lord, oh my soul, and all that is within me, praise His holy name!!!❤️✝️😇🌟

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  34. “I’m fabulously fashioned by God!” Life happens and I keep forgetting this but I do know it!! Thank you for the reminder. Sharing with friends.

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  55. “I’m fabulously fashioned by God!” I pray for the grace to never loose sight of His mighty great work in me. To know this full well in Jesus name Amen

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  56. I am fabulously fashioned by the hands of God and he created me unique and special in his sight but I do have to remind myself. Your words spoke to my heart and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for blessing me and my sisters in Christ!

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  66. Thank you Sharon. I came home just lady night comparing myself to the ladies in my group and feeling very much less than but today I’m saying, I’m fabulously fashioned by God.

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  67. I am fabulously fashioned by God.
    Easy to type. Hard to allow to sink in to my heart and soul. Though I know that God knit me in my mother’s womb and that we all have a purpose, I have a difficult time accepting that amazing thought for myself. It’s easy breezy to think of it for everyone…everyone but me. I’ve been reminded throughout my life that I’m not good enough. I carry it with me everywhere I go. It literally screams at me daily, never letting me forget. This is what I struggle with. This is what I know is holding me back from fulfilling whatever it is that God wants me to do or be.
    Father, help me. My pieces are so broken they don’t even look like they belong together.

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  68. “I’m fabulously fashioned by God!”
    Amazing how when God has a.message for us, late is right on time! And me reading this today is exactly that. Thank you so much for sharing this Sharon 🙏🏾

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  69. I am uniquely flawed according to the design and will of God. Because I am flawed I look to Him to use me as an influence to others who know they are flawed

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  71. I’m fabulously fashioned by God!” Lord please help US ALL to live this truth and not Satan LIES.
    In Jesus mighty name I pray🙏🏾
    Amen

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  73. I’m fabulously fashioned by GOD! Thank you for this. I have to keep this in mind, and not focus on what “others” say about me. My identity comes from the LORD.

    Reply

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