Have you ever felt like someone just knocked you over with words…not caring how it made you feel? I know I have. One day my Golden Retriever showed me just how it’s done.
Shortly after we had planted a maple tree in our backyard, we went on vacation. It was the first time we had left Ginger home alone. A neighbor fed and watched out for her while we were away. On the second day of our trip, I called Cathy to see how Ginger was doing.
“Well, Ginger’s fine,” Cathy reported. “But you know that tree you planted last week? She dug it up!”
“She did what!” I exclaimed.
“She dug it up. The tree’s lying in the yard.”
When we got home, we walked over to the toppled tree. Ginger tucked her tail and slunk into the garage like the bad dog she was.
When we planted the tree, we left a small piece of the burlap around the root ball exposed. Ginger spied that remnant peeking out of the ground and wanted it…bad. Several times we had caught her pawing at the burlap and reprimanded her with a stern “no!”
She ducked her head, crept away and waited for a more opportune time. I imagine that the moment she saw us load suitcases in the car and pull out of the driveway, she tiptoed over to the forbidden tree and began to dig. (Can dogs tiptoe? I think they can.) She must have dug and dug for hours with all her puppy might—flinging dirt in every direction. I’ve got to get to the bottom of this, she might have thought. This must be exposed!
Finally, she accomplished her mission and the burlap was totally uncovered! Exposed! Of course, she gave no thought to the tree she toppled in the meantime. It was never about the tree.
As I stared at the poor little maple lying helplessly in the hot summer sun, I thought about many friends, and myself for that matter, who’ve been in the same state—toppled and left to wither in the heat of glaring eyes.
Perhaps someone has a little flaw that peeks through the surface of his or her character. Then someone else comes along and decides that the flaw is a nuisance and must be exposed at all cost. That someone starts digging and digging—flinging dirt in every direction with no thought as to what all the digging is doing to the person’s heart.
Before you know it, the rough burlap, the unsightly character flaw, is unearthed and exposed for all to see. And the victim of that digging lies topped in the process. Lifeless, wounded, exposed—and for what purpose? To satisfy someone’s dogged determination to uncover a rough edge.
There are times in any friendship when confrontation is necessary, but we must always make sure that the confrontation is wrapped in prayer and tied with the ribbon of love. If we take any joy whatsoever in the process, then we must stop and check our motives and attitude.
Jesus said: “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye” (Matthew 7:3-5 NIV).
Here’s another truth to tether to Jesus’ words above: “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience” (Colossians 3:12 NIV). So, the choice is ours. Do we want to be a dirt slinger or a comfort bringer?
Steve and I gently removed what was left of the burlap sack around the root system, carefully sat the maple back up into her prepared soil, and lovingly patted the dirt back around her parched roots. Then, because of her weakened state, we braced her up with ropes tied to three stakes in the ground. I watered the weary maple daily, not knowing if she would recover from the trauma. In the end, the tree not only survived, she thrived.
Oh, that we would do the same for our toppled friends. When we see a friend who has been wounded by words, we can slowly stand her back up, lovingly reestablish her roots in the good soil of God’s Word, gently brace her up with kindness, and water her daily with prayer. Who knows? You may even help her not only survive, but also thrive.
Thankfully, Ginger left the tree alone after that episode. After all—she never cared about the tree in the first place.
Lord, I want to be a comfort bringer not a dirt slinger. Show me a friend who has been knocked down by life and give me the right words to brace them back up. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Let me be the first to encourage you today! You are a holy, chosen, dearly loved child of God who is equipped by God, empowered by the Holy Spirit, and enveloped in Jesus Christ!
Who is someone that has been an ecourager to you? Click on comment and leave that person’s name! Let’s celebrate!
Sharon’s best-selling book and Bible study guide, The Power of a Woman’s Words: How the Words You Speak Shape the Lives of Others has been a favorite for women’s Bible studies around the world. It is also great for individual study and an inspiring read. Get your copy today and begin to use your words to speak life to those around you! Tame that tongue! I know you can!
2024 by Sharon Jaynes. All rights reserved.
Comments 58
A Nurse Practitioner I work with at a prison.. her faith is strong and she saw I was hurting.. Joy Wells
My husband Mark. He helps me see things from a different perspective and encourages me and Believes in me and holds me up!
Vicki
Good morning I’m thankful for this devotional this morning, I would like thank my Sis friend April for being a constant blessing and encourager in this season of my life may the Lord continue to cover her and protect and pour back into her all that she gives out in Jesus name, Amen ✨
Yes, I have many friends from one Carolyn every time something appears to happen in my life she says You’re so strong you haveGod on your side you always praying to God God will help you through this.
Lynn has been an encouragement to me.
My pastor and his wife have been a great encouragement to me.
1 Thessalonians 5:11-“Therefore, encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are doing.
I want to thank my beautiful sisters, Cris and Cinthya for always being there for me. Whether to tell me that I’m wrong, in a loving way, or to encourage me in this faith path. Yeshua bless you hundredfold for being shoulders for my weak moments🙏❤️
Kim has been a godly encourager
Thanks so much this is so encouraging. Have learnt how to better encourage my friends who might be down due to bad words spoken to them in the past, to be able to help restore them to their former cheerful selves.
Yvonne
Good morning Sharon. I need prayer for my tongue. Yesterday as Florida braced for hurricane Milton (my daughter who is currently going to St Augustine University (will be 25 in November) thought she may stay and ride the storm out. I was so upset over this and told her that she was a very smart girl and made wonderful choices in life but if she stayed to ride the storm out, in my opinion she was a dumbass. I know I should not have said that but all I could think about were all the lives and properties destroyed in western Carolina I was so emotionally distraught. And then on top of that my husband, her dad, said she is 25 and she can make her own decisions Well that really sent
Me over the edge and I told him if he did not put his foot
down I would lose respect for him as a dad. My husband confronted me this morning and told me I was hateful to him and our daughter. I know my evil tongue was bad and I need forgiveness but honestly Sharon I was scared for her life I just lashed out. I prayed this morning to ask for forgiveness I just need to know from you am I a really a bad person for acting this way. (Hurt and stressed and worried) ❤️
Janet, we’re all ‘bad’ people, which is why we so desperately need a savior…and that savior is Jesus. It sounds like a terrifying place to be as a mama…and we must remember that God is in the restorer of hearts and relationships. James 5:16 ‘Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of righteous man is powerful and effective.’
Oh, Janet — we have all had times like this! Especially as a mother, we always worry about our children. God forgave you even before those words left your mouth. It was fear speaking — fear for your daughter’s safety, fear for feeling unsupported by your husband in this situation. Ask your daughter and husband for forgiveness, explain that fear took over and words came flying out. Remember that we are children of God and God’s perfect love casts out fear, but we are also human and sometimes that humanity takes over. I will be praying for you and your family today — and praying for safety over your daughter. God bless you all.
My sister Barbara. I’m thankful she’s been there for me through a lot of ups and downs. Praying for her now as she navigates this hurricane in Florida.
Can I share some good news? Yes you are a bad person — and so are we all and that is why Jesus died for our sins. He didn’t die for us because we are good people! He died for us because we are sinful and have dirty tongues and bad thoughts and say nasty things out of fear sometimes — and we can come to Him in genuine grief and repentance and ask forgiveness and He will do it every time. Hallelujah!
Janet, you are no worse than most of us. Swallow the pride, humble yourself to your husband and daughter. All will be well. Praying for safety for all those in the path of Milton, including your daughter.
Dottie Aebi here in Dallas. oregon has been a Godly example for and mentor to me for many years.
Oh my yes, just this past week and it makes my heart hurt with every thought of those words. I am grieving and hurting. Thank you for sharing.
I’m blessed to have two friends, Sharon and Mardell, who encourage me through the really hurtful times, right to this very minute. I thank God for both of these godly ladies.
I have just last week been in a similar dilemma. A friend approached me with scathing words and she even shouted so other people could hear. I should have walked away like Jesus would have wanted me to. I didn’t and it got very heated.
Suffice it to say, our friendship is over. It hurts and I pray to Jesus for strength. I should not have let myself be baited.
Thanks Sharon. That was a very convicting and encouraging message.
Trina
Beryln
Carlton
Mama Esther
Naudy
Geraldine
Kevin
Merrilyn
Thank you for your words of encouragement.
Cyndi Comiske
Cheryl Dyer
Rose Holesinger
Amanda Swartzentruber
Wonderful ladies to have as friends! Thank you girls!❤️
My prayer warrior sisters in Christ for over 30 yrs. Barbara and Frances!
Thank you Jesus!
My mom and my sisters are my people ! They pray amd emcourage me and others !
This post was difficult to read and yet timely. I want to be the type of woman who encourages and helps people back up. At the moment, I am the one who has been hurt and hung out to dry. I am struggling bc the hurt is once again, from church people.
My mom. Even with dementia her true character comes through. She’s been a champion for her children and so many others her entire life.
My two wonderful sister-friends, Elsie Dickson and Patricia Baffoe, have been great encouragers to me esp in times when words have left me broken and scarred. My cousins, Josephine and Nancy Bampoe, and another friend, Luvina Ankrah. I bless God for each of these women that God uses daily to pick me up and dust the dirt off of me.
Ouch. This was so convicting this morning. God, please forgive me for the times I have been like Ginger in this story. Sharon, you truly blessed my heart with this message this morning! Thank you for using the gift of your writing to share this reminder and this truth.
I am thankful for my friend Nancy who continually encourages me and always points me to Christ!
My good buddy Catherine. I call her Catherine the Great. You cannot out-encourage her. She is a blessing going somewhere to happen!
My daughter Lisa
I would like to thank my sister friend Sabrina. She has been my dear sweet encouraging friend for over 20 plus years. She is a special person in my life & I’m forever grateful to God for bringing her in my life. She makes me laugh, encourages me, calms me, is a great attentive listener when I need a listening ear & helping hand. I love ❤️ her dearly. 🙏🏾
Thank you my sister friend. I appreciate you and how you have been there for me over the years. God bless you and your family. Love you so much and Thank you 😊 for sharing this with me. It’s a deep message and I pray everyone reading is encouraged. ❤️
Mark from the Daily Hope devotional. Though we have never met, he has become a great friend and dear brother in Christ. We encourage each other and pray for each other daily. I praise God for him!
I would like to thank members and volunteers at Chestnut Hill Missionary Baptist Church. They are serving God and those of us still without power (12 days) with food, supplies, water, love and new friendships. They are witnessing God’s love.
My daughter. I have no other friends or family that care. Going to God in prayer is my source of strength and comfort.
My Dear Sister and Friend Chaplain Claudia is a constant source of blessing and encouragement to me! I thank God for my Dear Claudia! 🙏🏽❤️
Thankful to be someone that’s uplifts others and encourages
My dear, sweet friend Cathy and my wonderful sister-in-law Vanessa
My wonderful friend Jannine stayed with me on the day I decided to divorce my husband and I literally thought I would sue if a broken heart. God spoke through her telling me “it’s going to be ok”.
Gina, her marriage has been a tough one for her. Many church services she comes forward with tears in her eyes asking for prayers. Sunday I sat in front of her and was praying and preparing for communion. My body language must have given away the difficult thoughts I was having. She gently reached forward and gave me an ever so tender neck massage that reached all the way to my heart.
My grown son Kevin, age 32, is my biggest encourager and such a blessing. He is recently engaged and his fiancé Elizabeth is also very encouraging to both of us.
And in response to Janet, I live close to St Augustine and local news is reporting a mandatory evacuation there now so I encourage everyone to follow the instructions of emergency management officials and I pray that there is no loss of life or injury due to this hurricane.
Love your devotionals, Sharon. My twin sister, Paula and my “second mum” Mandy Bolton are very special people in my life
My good friend Trudy, she is someone that I trust and turn to in times of turmoil.
Deborah F., a loving sister and friend! She has been my inspiration and my rock!
How blessed am I to have such a beautiful person in my life!
I’ve benefited from many encouragers, but my comment is about the tree.
If the burlap had been left around the roots, the tree would have struggled. I’m a gardener, and I can say with complete confidence that removing the burlap created a healthier tree.
I’ve had times in my life when the burlap has been exposed and that has caused me to make a needed change. To get rid of the burlap that lies below the surface and keeps me from flourishing. I’ve also had times when I’ve rehidden that burlap just as fast as I could.
Thank you for your story and its meaning on many levels. I appreciate your words.
I am grateful for my praying husband, my prayer partners from my church Sister Z and Minister Hill. I’m blessed to have my Biologial Sister Dee and my Two Sisters in Christ and Love, Mo and Temp. They are all my Angels on earth.🙏🏽
My sweet and dear friend Chamaine is an encouraging; humble; loving soul that is so sensitive and thoughtful of my life stages…. She brightens my days in numerous and kind ways I am so thankful for her beautiful friendship!
Phyllis Starks encourages me so much. May God continue to bless and strengthen her.
Gina, who helped save me from the abyss of a psychopath. She is the most giving person I know and never stops believing in me.
Todd, who has shown me true love and compassion. His positivity and encouragement is contagious.
Sharon Jaynes!!!
Thank you for all the encouragement you have given me over the years!
I was blessed to get to hear you speak in Spring Hill earlier this year! You are an amazing lady and a encouraging mentor!
Author
Thank you Connie. It is an honor to share life with you ladies!
A student who is struggling with self worth.
My husband Jacob he has been such a comfort and encouraging
My friend, Ruth.
Thankyou Sharon,
This is such a great message!
What people speak over our life, can either be liberating or lead to our own personal dread. We need to know when to do our personal housekeeping and set healthy boundaries.
We are so blessed!!!!
The greatest encourager in my life is my friend/mentor/role model/sister in Christ/Bible Study teacher/prayer partner/exercise partner/Counselor/Nurse and my Pastor’s wife, Sylvia. She has been there for me in the beginning until today. I have been healed and growing in my walk with Jesus since way back then until today because of her. Of course, she’s been God’s instrument for ministering to me. I used to be a couch potato but she’s been able to nurse me back to life. And today I feel/know that I’m Spiritually equipped to be able to teach young girls from the Church and the community.
My mom, she encourages me and has encouraged me my entire life.