My son, Steven, was in the ninth grade when I turned in the manuscript for my book, Being a Great Mom, Raising Great Kids. I should have waited until he was in the tenth grade.
That fateful morning, I placed my neatly printed pages in a padded enveloped, prayed a blessing over the bundle, and then dropped a year of hard work in the mail slot at the post office. When I returned home, my phone was ringing. It was Steven.
“Hey, Mom, I’m calling to let you know that I’m in the principal’s office. I got caught stealing in the lunchroom. You need to come to the school.”
I sped to the school, stomped down the hall, and opened the principal’s door. There sat this strange person wearing my son’s clothes slumped sheepishly in a chair. Steven got five days of in-school suspension, which was the least of his worries.
After I got him home, I wanted to climb back into that mailbox and GET THAT BOOK OUT OF THERE! Who did I think I was writing a book on parenting? What was I thinking? What an idiot! I am so disqualified! I called the publisher and told them the story, giving them an out. The vice president just said with a smile in his voice, “Welcome to the real world.”
That was over 20 years ago, but I still cling to the lesson learned.
The Bible tells us, “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do” (Ephesians 2:10). The Greek word translated “handiwork” is poēma, which also means masterpiece, workmanship, epic poem. God created us for a purpose and a plan before we were born. He even marked out the times and places we would live (Acts 17:26).
How silly to think that His plans could be altered or negated because of something we’ve done, or something that has been done to us. We’ll never hear God say, “Oops, I didn’t see that coming.” God does the qualifying. Not me. Not you. Not anyone.
Consider Paul’s words to the Corinthians: “It’s not that we think we are qualified to do anything on our own. Our qualification comes from God. He has enabled us to be ministers of his new covenant” (2 Corinthians 3:5–6 NLT).
It is all about God from start to finish. My earthly qualifications to do what God called me to do are really irrelevant.
I felt the incident with Steven had disqualified me. God said it didn’t. Looking back, I needed that struggle. Steven had been an easy kid. If I was going to be teaching anybody anything about raising kids, I needed to hit a wall, climb over it, and find Jesus cheering for me on the other side.
Okay, you might be thinking, So what, your kid stole from the lunchroom. I’ve stolen someone’s husband. I’ve been arrested. I’ve traded sex for money. I’ve had an abortion. We could compare mistakes and missteps all day long. But the devil taunts us with the same word: disqualified.
Go ahead, say the word aloud. Can you hear the serpent’s hiss? What most of us think disqualifies us is often the wound that actually qualifies us to know what we’re talking about.
In the Bible, Paul could talk about grace because his Christian-killing-past-self had received so much of it. He knew what he was talking about.
The woman caught in adultery could talk about forgiveness because she had experienced it firsthand. She knew what she was talking about.
Don’t let the devil tell you that your past pain disqualifies you from your present calling. There’s nothing he would like more than for you to hold an audition in your head and stamp a big REJECTED across your own forehead.
Here’s some good news: The audition has been canceled. You got the part.
Heavenly Father, thank You that I am qualified to do what You have called me to do because of the finished work of Jesus Christ on the cross and His Spirit in me. Nothing more. Nothing less. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Is there something that has happened to you or a choice that you have made that has made you feel disqualified from serving Jesus? If so, what does today’s truth say to that? Leave a comment and let’s share.
Digging Deeper
Many of us feel broken. Our mistakes, the pain others have caused us, and circumstances outside our control taunt us every day, though we long to turn a new page. In When You Don’t Like Your Story:What if Your Worst Chapters Could Become Your Greatest Victories, I ask: What if God doesn’t want us to rip out our difficult stories but repurpose them for good? What if your story is the very one someone else needs to hear to experience healing in theirs?
This book also includes a Bible Study and is perfect for women’s group. There’s also a video!
© 2024 by Insert Sharon Jaynes. All rights reserved.
Comments 19
Asked of needed to read this today.I am having such a hard time. Thank you
Sharon, I’m so glad that I went to that Blo9m Conference in Westfield Massachusetts all those years ago and met you! And, yes, I am finding God DOES take our deepest wounds and repurposes them into our greatest victories to be shared with others, for their benefit and His Glory! Thank you for all you do, your heart towards God and sharing your gifts of writing and emotional transparency!!! ❤
We just finished this book with my daughters, one of my daughter best friend, my granddaughter and her cousin and one of her friends. I was amazed at each lady being all in for this study
We have learn much. I have learned even when you don’t feel you are capable step out in faith and see what our FATHER will do. Thank you
Your words are heartfelt abd inspirational. You have been given a gift. Thank for sharing.
Outstanding read. Spackle for heart holes…
Thank you for sharing this! My latest disqualifying situation was coming to the end of my ability to wait on God to change my husband. What I thought I needed was a husband we loved me like only God truly can. I was lonely and I was going to tell him he needed to be that for me. He would not talk to me. I did not respect his “no”. I push for answers. He pushed back. We ended up in a domestic violence cases that has hurt both of us deeply and ended in separation and for me the fear of becoming a divorced woman. My worst fear as I was raised to believe it was the worst failure any wife can have.
I demanded God fix this. He has not removed the threat, yet in His gracious love and mercy He is working on both of our hearts to soften us. The wait sometimes seems desparate. Thank you for writing this. It is helping me surrender to more of the worst case scenario being part of God’s story. The guilt I feel thinking I could be one of the “failures” keeps me from having peace that God is Sovereignly in control of my/our story.
I have worked all my life for acceptance by being the good /perfect Christian. I thought being good gave me value.
It’s not that we think we are qualified to do anything on our own. Our qualification comes from God. He has enabled us to be ministers of his new covenant” (2 Corinthians 3:5–6 NLT).
Heavenly Father, thank You that I am qualified to do what You have called me to do because of the finished work of Jesus Christ on the cross and His Spirit in me. Nothing more. Nothing less. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Thank you for a great message that I and many of us need to hear
Thank you this message. I was laying on my bed, praying Lord forgive me. I make mistakes everyday. I feel unworthy of your mercy and forgiveness. I live a life that seems to drain everything inside me. I’ve been married Fifty years to a man that belittles me, curses me and has even abused me. He tells me how stupid I am, you can’t do that your not smart enough. I lived in church my whole life, raised to read my bible to pray and trust in his word. I’ve prayed for my husband and turned him over to God. When covid hit, that was the decline in going to church. I feel helpless, lost, lonely and even scared. I know I would not be here today if I didn’t know that my Father in heaven loved me. I have recently been told I have stage 3 kidney disease. I know my God can heal my brokenness and my disease. I would appreciate your prayers. I am 70 years old and I want to live for the Lord and be in my grown children’s lives. Thank you Sharon for your message touches my heart all the time.
Dear Anita, please know that you deserve to not be abused. May God lead you to wholeness, healing and safety, and send you the wisdom, clarity, and help you need. May God work speedily on your husband and deliver him from darkness to light. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.
I was in an unhealthy relationship with someone which I blamed my illness. I have a neurological condition.
Anyways the funny thing is I was doing the opposite of what I believed in but I was aware of my surroundings. Even the guy, I turned him down first time I saw him (I was not a Christian and fresh from high school when he asked me out.) We were at a party. I totally looked down on him. But for some reason I forgot (this happened in 2007 when we had a relationship).
Long story short I came to a realization that I had sinned against God. I remembered my promise to God that i would practice abstinence and remain a virgin until the wedding night with my future Christian husband.
I went into a deep depression and wanted to kill myself. I would cry constantly. I was so remorseful.
I had broke my promise with God! And the guy I had a relationship with was not the guy I wanted to be with for the rest of my life.
It took me a year to get over it. I joined the Girls Bible study and that’s when i grew spiritually. I forgot about that incident and the guy.
Now that I say that I love God, I must obey him. I discovered that in:
John 14:15 says: “If you love me, obey[a] my commandments.
I did somethings in my past that could destroy my future. I have been to jail for crimnal Domestic violence for slapping my son’s father. I also have been to jail for assault for bitting my daughter’ s father and when I apply for a job which I am doing now if they do a background check and these two things come up I will not get a job because of it. I am also in the process of looking for a house and by rent being so high I can not afford it well me and my husband and I am having to rely on assistance just to be able to get me a house and this is tearing me up inside. Your words really hit me differently and now my thoughts are better thank you for that and may God bless you
What a liar Satan is! I got pregnant as a senior in high school. So much shame, embarrassment and striving to cover it up even though I married the father of my baby and served in ministry. But what freedom I found in telling my story instead of hiding it. I’ve served at a crisis pregnancy center for over 10 years. When I tell these precious ladies there is a good life after an unplanned pregnancy I know what I’m talking about!
How can I even begin to list all the selfish and foolish mistakes I have made through out my life time. But I’m always reminded that Jesus loves me and forgives me when I confess my sins and ask him to restore me and to keep pressing on. It’s Satan that keeps stirring up feelings of unworthiness and that I will never measure up to God’s standards. But the devil is a liar and I stand firm in my faith that Jesus is my
Lord and Savior! God Bless you my sisters in Christ! 🙏✝️
I love you Sharon Jaynes. All your work speaks to my heart.
Thank you Sharon, I needed this so badly. Your devotional s are such a blessing to me as I struggle day by day with myself! God bless you and keep you❣️🙏
There are some days that I still have a hard time wrapping my head around the idea that God knew from my beginning that I would be unfaithful to my husband after 30 years of marriage. Part of it was due to an addiction to pornography I’d had since I was a young girl. But in his infinite grace and mercy, God saved my life multiple times and reached for me in my pit of hatred and shame to show me who He really created me to be. It took Him years and a lot of pain, sleepless nights, health problems and a marriage that needed to be redeemed, but He saw me through it all. Never once forsaking me and always telling me I was worth it. I now work with women who have been unfaithful to give them hope that there can be redemption and healing and I also share my story of pornography addiction to young girls who are facing this scourge on our society. I have seen first hand that God can take the worst thing and make it the best thing.
That my past does not define me so I press on to the goal the prize at the end to spend the rest of my life with Jesus! Thank you for your wonderful work and words to spread the gospel
Wow! I needed to read this post today. Thank you to you Sharon because you are a spiritually gifted lady. I enjoy all your post & they seem to always be relevant to my current circumstances. I also thank all who shared & pray for all of you, that God will turn it all around in your favor. I am struggling right now, as I feel lost in my calling in life. I pray all the time for God’s guidance and wisdom. I have been working a temporary job bc I lost my job a couple of years ago. With this current job, I have been working amongst very toxic people that has belittled me, been disrespectful & out right mean. I pray for those who persecute me. I even started questioning my self worth & capabilities. But, then reading God’s Word he reminded me that I am a child of the most high! He has better plans, favor, & miracles for me. I am worthy, pleasing and valuable in God’s eyes. I am the apple of his eye. That’s what truly matters to me most, pleasing my Lord Christ and savior & obeying his commands. Jesus loves me unconditionally & he loves you all as well. Stay lifted & know that we all are blessed in the Lord Christ savior! Glory be to God. Amen, Amen & let the church say Amen! 🙏🏾🫶🏽👏🏽❤️
May God’s blessings be upon all of you dear ladies, as well as his encouragement, joy, and peace. God bless us all!